Dionne’s Angry Stare Comes in Handy

Dionne’s Angry Stare Comes in Handy by Roxanne McDonald

Oh, hell, no! We open and close episode 11 of this season’s “America’s Next Top Model” with the angry looks.

Dionne discusses how she has been or has to work on her mistaken appearances as an angry model (having given the judges another series of poses last week that all looked the same—mad.

Natasha gets googly with her husband on the phone, leaning in close enough to get the others’ attention and elicit Renee’s saying she is weird and crazy—which Renee pantomimes for us with the circling of the side of the head motion…just in case we didn’t get the verbal interpretation.

Natasha discusses how the others are “always watching…always judging,” and says she “will get them.” Yikes. And we thought she was the kindest of the crowd.

Rainy day aboriginal dances are first on the agenda. In Royal National Park, Uncle Max greets the girls in aboriginal dress and face paint, then introduces them to his niece, Calita.

They explain the first task, and Renee then translates it for us by saying she thinks it is “all about telling a story,” she says: “They tell through dance; we tell through pictures.” Uh, yuh, sometimes. Mostly you just hawk stuff through pictures, dear.
Dionne scowls that she finally gets that it is more of “a acting type of dance” and Calita explains that they will indeed be doing a storyboard in person—painting, body movement, and oral speech the criteria for best.

Renee does a very thorough abuse and sisterhood combined theme; Jaslene does more agony and suffering but finding a way through life, love, and laughing; Natasha does her childhood and big dreams thing in a very hushed voice…to get their attention (or, I guess that of anyone not sitting straight up and eyes forward?); and Dionne…here we go…Dionne tells us she don’t want to do no dance” and hell no, tell a story? What story she rags. She does it anyway in a very quick and simple yeah, yeah, yeah performance.

Course, when Renee wins and chooses fellow pain survivor Jaslene, and after they get expensive pearl jewelry, Dionne backpedals a bit. Seventeen Magazine’s Carissa Rosenberg plugs the publication’s popularity as she discusses her intention in picking a winner: thirteen million readers, she says, want to know about you and your past. They want to connect on different levels. Renee, she says, wins, because she believes people would care and connect on those different levels.

When the jewelry man arrives, Dionne is jealous and kicking herself for not trying, or for not giving “just a little bit more;” and Natasha is off in the other room getting sick (well, coming down with a cold). Renee says these kinds of pearls are “the jewelry royalty wears,” and Jaslene says it is “absolutely stunning.”

Natasha stays in bed while the other three go out on the town, but the celebration must have been uneventful for we don’t get much footage.

Next day the photo shoot carries on the motif of the wild and the body art and all. Jaslene is a red-breasted robin; Dionne is Qwon Dong (Tyra says, or something like this) the food gatherer; Natasha is a wiggly wagtail; and Renee does the dance of the butterfly.

Jaslene has a striking, strong face, says Nigel, but he would have liked to have seen something different from her for a change.

Dionne is not mean-looking in her final photo, but now Tyra says because this new look is too happy she has to find a happy medium.

Renee, who did some gorgeous and varied stuff and who thinks Tyra will really be impressed, does indeed have the best and most beautiful shots.
And Natasha’s happy dance has fallen on its face…because she has allowed her having a cold to ruin her day (and her face). Jay Manuel had consistently lectured her that even sick, just as Tyra does, she has to bring the supermodel, do or die, try harder.

This week was also the classic judging test where they are each asked two questions—who she thinks has the most Top Model potential and who she thinks has the least…and why.

Dionne says Jazz has the most potential, as she likes her appearance, her personality, and the conversations they have. The other three name themselves as the model with the mostest.

Dionne, Renee, and Jaslene all say Natasha is the one with the least potential. Twiggy, however, suggests that because Natasha has the beauty, the laugh, the personality, that maybe the others are merely jealous; and Natasha responds that it is better to be talked about than to be not noticeable.

I love that comment the best. (…besides Dionne’s Oh, hell, no! weeklies….)

Renee is handed her photo first, followed by Jaslene. That leaves Natasha and Dionne in the bottom two. After her usual positive/negative spiel about each girl, she ends with how Natasha may be hiding something bad from the judges and how the others, who live with her, might be banded against her for a reason. They also, however, Tyra adds, could just be jealous…Natasha, she says at the same time she hands Natasha her photo.

And Dionne scowls—leaving us unsure of whether she is in shock, as pissed as she has been about almost every challenge, or just posing her usual stoic—she thinks—pose.

Sorry, Dionne.

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