The Fat Bastard is at it Again
The Fat Bastard is at it Again by Roxanne McDonald
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Denny Crane offends yet another offends yet another person, this time an associate who is racking up the dollars every time he speaks. |
What is it about a fat ass who calls another person fat when he is fat (if not fatter) himself?
Not much, usually. But Denny Crane is so indefinably endearing that it somehow works for him to be bigoted, misogynistic, self-involved and self-aggrandizing.
Well, it works for him as a character (on Boston Legal), though I doubt he would last long as a socially appropriate, socially accepted human in this pc world of ours.Crane typically offends by hitting on women with sexual entendres…, no, straight-up sexual suggestions and comments. If the recipient of his brash and crass come-on is in any way afflicted, Crane has no problem tossing some pointed slurs in the same direction and at the same time. (read more…)
Starting Off on a Sour Note but Ending with Perfection
Starting Off on a Sour Note but Ending with Perfection by Roxanne McDonald
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Yikes. The opening number, a booming spectacular featuring the top finalists singing the Kool and the Gang song “Celebration,” was an embarrassing display of “talent”. But of the top four, at least two saved the introduction to the finale, and winner Terry Fator rocks the house one last wonderful time. |
Throughout the season on “America’s Got Talent,” I loved the Glamazons and had respect for the green Julienne, but yeeow. In the finale they were off-key and doing more
caterwauling than celebrating for the first few minutes, there.
But my favorites, Cas and Butterscotch, came through, as all four of the top finalists did in the fresh-as-can-be-fresh- for-a-reality-competition finale.
What I suggest by “fresh” is how nice it was to have each of the final four perform with celebrities in their area/genre, which was of course also done these last two seasons by sister show, Idol. But what was tear-jerking and newer was the use of surprise video messages by the finalists’ idols, for instance, that made us all (or most of us) tear up.
1 vs 100 so Thunderdome
1 vs 100 so Thunderdome by Roxanne McDonald
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I’m pretty sure this is a repeat episode and I’m pretty sure Bob Saget gets close to the eery truth with his silly jokey thing about the moment the contestant insults the mob. |
Insult the mob she does… a couple of times. Contestant Carrie or Kary S. [no subscript, so no correct spelling, here] snipes during one question her doubts whether the mob is smart enough to get the correct answer, then at another
question—on exercise stylings—jabs something about how she doubts this mob knows much about exercise.
Okay, so there are some flabby folks up there in the neon bleachers, but there are also models and all kinds of fit-looking fellows.
Better is when she gets a question about how many six-packs would one need to make 99 bottles of beer on the wall, and after doing some back assward math that gets her nowhere, she says she doesn’t drink beer and therefore needs help answering the question.
Okay, wait. What?
That’s nothin’. Among the mob members are a 40-year-old virgin named Michael B. Rich; the current mob champion (at the time of the original airing), Ned Andrews; six school principals; and six Maxim models. One of the Maxim models gets the answer wrong and sniffs how she doesn’t drink that nasty beer that bloats you all up but drinks wine instead.
Corse, Saget is ever quick-with-a-reort, and asks her how many bottles of wine she drinks [to be of a mindset that believes you have to be a beer drinker to answer a math question concerning numbers of bottles of beer].
Whooooooo. I am exhausted and the game has yet to get fired up, ala Thunderdome!
Later, we get to see Adam West, three Rhodes scholars, and six drag queens, so I had better not give up on the show yet.
Here are the questions, albeit repeats:
Carrie/Kary’s questions
1 vs. 100
1. Wesley Snipes decides to pay his taxes with the standard IRS form. Which one should he use?
a. NC-17
b. 1-800
c. 1040
1 vs. 98
2. Which fairy tale character could have been booked on “Law & Order” on an unlawful entry rap?
a. Rapunzel
b. Goldilocks
c. Little Red Riding Hood
1 vs. 70
3. How many six-packs do you need to have 99 bottles of beer on the wall?
a. more than 15
b. exactly 15
c. fewer than 15
1 vs. 50
4. Which actress is married to actor Matthew Broderick?
a. star of “Six Feet Under”
b. star of “Sex and the City”
c. star of “The Sopranos”
1 vs. 46
5. Who developed a type of exercise that uses a Wunda chair, a Cadillac, and a Reformer?
a. Tommy Tae Bo
b. Joseph Pilates
c. Harry Yoga
1 vs. 36
6. What character on “Saved by the Bell” shares his nickname with a sound made by an automobile?
a. Honk
b. Squeak
c. Screech
1 vs. 34
7. Wich is not one of the four colors in the Microsoft Windows logo?
a. yellow
b. green
c. brown
1 vs. 34
8. On “Late Night with Conan O’Brien,” who is Conan’s band leader?
a. R.E.M.’s guitarist
b. Bruce Springsteen’s drummer
c. Dave Matthews’ sax player
Barry’s questions
1vs. 100
9. What device made by Apple would you use to listen to an MP3 of “Old MacDonald had a Farm”?
a. epod
b. ipod
c. eieiopod
1 vs. 99
10. If you mistook your grandpa for a Pez dispenser, what part of his body would you expect the candy to come from?
a. ears
b. nose
c. throat
1 vs. 95
11. Which part of London, England shares its name with president Bill Clinton’s daughter?
a. Chelsea
b. Victoria
c. Kensington
1 vs. 93
12. What foreign phrase is the title of the hit Broadway musical based on songs of Abba?
a. Sacre Bleu!
b. Mamma Mia!
c. Achtung!
1 vs. 86
13. At U.S. grocery store check-outs, which type of bag is chosen most often?
a. paper
b. plastic
c. both selected almost equally
1 vs. 71: to be continued (or not)
Peekaboo versus Polkinghorne
Peekaboo versus Polkinghorne by Roxanne McDonald
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It wasn’t until I was a third of the way through this July 13th episode of “1 vs. 100” that I suspected I was taking notes on a re-run…but since I have gone to such involved trouble, will repeat the repeat, then. |
Gawd, I get so discombobulated at this time of the year with TV. Good thing it’s not a life-saving device that like a dialysis patient one depends on for consistency of scheduling: first there are missing/skipped episodes, then there are trading time slots (I’m still trying to keep up with FOX and “On the Lot” as it jumps from Monday to Tuesday and back again),
then there are time’s-up episodes to-be-continued-the-following-week which do NOT pick up the following week.
That’s my silly gripe, here, as I excitedly tuned in for a continuation of the cutie with the curt, no-nonsense responses: Paula Russell was on her sixth question when “1 vs. 100” ended last week…. Where in hell is her continuation?
Anyway, here are the questions you have likely already seen and gotten answers to, for the equally delightful, animated and now 174,000 richer Peekaboo—who was up against a mob that included nine Hooters girls; Annie Duke; the Jeopardy! Player who unseated Ken Jennings, Brad Rutter; and the reigning “1 vs. 100” mob champion, who had made it through 25 questions before being knocked out, Rex Polkinghorne [whom Peekaboo also knocks out, I think]:
1 vs. 100
1. If you pick up one of these at a bar, which will probably be a virgin?
a) a Rob Roy b) a Shirley Temple c) a Harvey Wallbanger
1 vs. 97
2. Who would most likely be cured on the TV series “House”?
a) a baby with rabies b) a deceased priest c) a beaver with a fever
1 vs. 75
3. What is featured on the logo for Elmer’s Glue?
a) a mascot with an earring b) a mascot with a nose ring c) a mascot with a tongue ring
1 vs. 49
4. If you had a nickel for every dime that’s in a dollar, how much money would you have?
a) 20 cents b) 50 cents c) 100 cents
1 vs. 41
5. How much gas is needed to drive the course of the Boston Marathon in a Hummer?
a) more than one gallon b) less than one gallon c) exactly one gallon
1 vs. 33
6. What is the stage name of Matthew Miller, the popular Orthodox Jewish Reggae/Rap star?
a) Matisyahu b) Black Shabbas c) Vanilla Iceberg
1 vs. 26
7. Which multimillionaire has had the most formal education?
a) Lebron James b) Dakota Fanning c) Donald Trump
1 vs. 20
8. You are a carpet salesman sent to completely cover the earth’s deserts. On which would you make the most money?
a) the biggest one in Africa b) the biggest one in Asia c) the biggest one in North America
1 vs. 12
9. You touch your grandmother’s elbow and feel a spark. What do you have an excess buildup of?
a) protons b) neutrons c) electrons
1 vs. 11 [Just for kicks, as Peekaboo has decided to take the 174,000, saying this is for his mama, who didn’t raise no fool!]
10. Which airline trades on the New York Stock Exchange using the symbol LUV?
a) Luftansa b) Northwestern c) Southwestern
Two Cuties Take on the Mob for the Money
Two Cuties Take on the Mob for the Money by Roxanne McDonald
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A “1 vs. 100” player who is lovely to look at makes it all the way to 156 grand before taking off, and an adorably confident and bright player takes over, without hesitation, answering the first six of her questions with lightning speed and with perfect accuracy. |
Jay Stakeland (sic) made it delightful for us viewers, as not only was he pretty sharp but was great looking. Paula Russell also made watching “1 vs. 100” enjoyable, as she is pop culture savvy and quick with retorts. When, for
example, Bob Saget comments on how quickly she answers a question, she lets him know she plans on being around for awhile, and so, yes, that is her answer—a correct one, mind you.
Also playing, in the mob, were David Eckstein, World Series MVP for the St. Louis Cardinals; Brad Rutter, the player who beat Ken Jennings; ten Laker girls; several “Las Vegas” cast members; several Las Vegas showgirls; several dealers from the Southpoint Hotel and Casino; Kevin Federline, better known as K-Fed; and Annie Duke, professional poker player—or as cyber-writers have it, the best female poker player in the world.
Questions are just as entertaining as ever, and, though Jay suggested they could be more straightforward (heh-heh), they are as interestingly formed as ever, too.
Here are the latest questions:
Jay’s Questions
1 vs. 100
1. You call your neurologist and he asks, “Can you hold?” Which song would worsen that “gotta go” feeling?
a. “Dust in the Wind,” by Kansas
b. “High and Dry,” by Radiohead
c. “Waterfalls”, by TLC
1 vs. 94
2. Christina Aguilera got her start on a TV club named for what character?
a. a waterfowl
b. a canine
c. a vermin
1 vs. 65
3. In the nursery rhyme “Hey diddle, diddle…,” who did the dish run away with?
a. the china
b. the flatware
c. the glassware
1 vs. 52
4. In the computer world of bytes, which is largest?
a. gigabyte
b. megabyte
c. kilobyte
1 vs. 34
5. How many total syllables are in the word “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”?
a. 8
b. 14
c. 20
1 vs. 26
6. If the nickname of the Iron Giant was the same as his chemical symbol, what would his peeps call him?
a. AG
b. FE
c. SN
1 vs. 22
7. Which country does not share a border with the homeland of Borat?
a. Egypt
b. China
c. Russia
Paula’s Questions
1 vs. 100
8. In the well-known tongue twister, what does she do by the seashore?
a. she sells seashells
b. she fixes Swiss wristwatches
c. she slits sheets
1 vs. 98
9. There’s a grease fire in the kitchen. Which product will safely extinguish it?
a. baking soda
b. water
c. gasoline
1 vs. 86
10. If you must be at least 40 inches tall to go on the Star Wars ride, which Star Wars character would be left behind?
a. Chewbacca
b. C-3PO
c. Yoda
1 vs. 78
11. Your Halloween costume was the U.S. president in the Watergate affair. Who were you dressed as?
a. one who rhymes with tush
b. one who rhymes with vixen
c. one who rhymes with martyr
1 vs. 76
12. Which was not a name used by one of the Sex Pistols?
a. Nasty
b. Rotten
c. Vicious
1 vs. 43
13. Which comedian created and narrates the TV series “Everybody Hates Chris?”
a. the host of the 2005 Academy Awards
b. the voice of the donkey in Shrek
c. the detective in Rush Hour
to be continued…1 vs. 33
Mob Getting Smarter
Mob Getting Smarter by Roxanne McDonald
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I should know. It takes quite a sharp wit to recap a Q & A game show such as “1 vs. 100.” |
Hey, give me a break. Sometimes I need to go into relaxed mode, and sometimes you need the results of the equivalent of one of the best trivia games on TV.
Tonight, the mob of 100 contains three summa cum laudes, four professional wrestlers, nine beauty pageant winners,
eight Trekkies, and Sister Rose, a sweet and stoic nun who is playing for The Daughters of St Paul Retired Sisters Fund. There you go: there’s something I bet you never though of—how lay people live after “retirement”.
In addition, by the time the second contestant is on his fifth question, the mom is composed of 73% of the remaining 73 mobsters having college degrees. So you can feel for the man when he can’t seem to stump the mob all that easily.
Anyway, here are questions for both contestants this week.
1. Monique, returning from last week, is 1 vs. 68
What crime shares its name with the world’s best-selling video game series?
a) Breaking and Entering b) Grand Theft Auto c) Malicious Mischief
2. 1 vs. 68
The celebrity couple known by what name has not appeared in a movie together?
a) Brangelina b) TomKat c) Vaughniston
3. 1 vs. 65
If the Ancient Romans had a hit game show pitting one person against 100 strangers, what would its title be?
a) I vs. L b) I vs. X c) I vs. C
4. New contestant Jonathan, as 1 vs. 100
Ellen Degeneres was the voice of Dory in the 2003 animated hit featuring what?
a) fish b) toys c) monsters
5. 1 vs. 100
Which of the seven deadly sins is the game character Mz. Pacman most guilty of?
a) gluttony b) envy c) sloth
6. 1 vs. 95
In the classic Roald Dahl tale, a boy named James crawls inside a giant what?
a) fruit with a husk b) fruit with a pit c) fruit from a vine
7. 1 vs. 87
What is Judge Judy’s last name?
a) Sheindlin b) Hatchett c) Wapner
8. 1 vs. 73
Which is not one of the fifty ways to leave your lover listed by Paul Simon in his famous song?
a) slip out the back, Jack b) make a new plan, Stan c) hire an attorney, Ernie
9. 1 vs. 70
According to your GPS, you’re at 0 degrees longitude and 0 degrees latitude. Where are you?
a) North Pole b) Equator c) South Pole
10. 1 vs. 53
Which animal is not indigenous to Africa?
a) the mascot of Toys R Us b) the mascot of MGM c) the mascot of Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes
11. 1 vs. 47
Steve Miller’s “Fly Like an Eagle” would most likely be the theme song of what Greek character?
a) Icarus b) Oedipus c) Orpheus
Still Going Strong with and against the Mob
Still Going Strong with, against, or in Spite of the Mob by Roxanne McDonald
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Not sure if “1 vs. 100” has become seasonal, takes turns with “identity”, or just shows whenever it shows…. But was so happy to have it back on NBC the other night, regardless. |
I got so hooked on “1 vs. 100.” Then I reconciled my resentment when I got an eyeful of the fresh (at least for the last 20 years of TV) concept of “Idnetity”. The two shows then seemed to alternate Fridays, or months, then disappeared?
So I ignored the entry on my white board schedule of best TV to watch…until last night, when I inadvertently flipped to NBC (during East Coast prime time), and almost peed a little when I saw that adorable and clever host, Bob Saget.
New mob members included hippies in one segment, and in another a sidebar note explained how 79% of the mob have a college degree.
Also new (I think) is the interactive challenge at break time: instead of answering a facile question and getting your name entered for a “chance” to win (and be put on one or another mailing lists, I imagine), the challenge was to guess which mob member was sitting on the secret stash one lucky caller/texter could win.
The questions are just as clever as Saget’s delivery and quips. Here are the ones I caught, though I apologize for not knowing the name of the first contestant (which I missed twice):
For the first contestant, who looked like a soap star I once watched:
1. In the fraction 1/100, what is the proper term for the number 100?
a) numerator
b) denominator
c) remainder
2. You’re driving from AR to NE with no AC in your SUV. Which direction are you going?
a) SW
b) NE
c) NW
3. Which of the following is not the name of a real person who had a salad named for him?
a) Bob Cobb
b) Ceasar Cardini
c) Francoise Nicoise
With new contestant, Portia
4. Which of the following is a character in the board game “Clue”?
a) Captain Ketchup
b) Colonel Mustard
c) Miss Mayonnaise
5. Which shortcut would help you remember the names of the Great Lakes?
a) FACE
b) HOMES
c) ROY G BIV
6. If The Wedding Crashers crashed My Big Fat Greek Wedding, what dessert could they expect?
a) Baklava
b) Moussaka
c) Spanikopita
7. Which song by The Who is not the theme song of a “CSI” show?
a) “Won’t Get Fooled Again”
b) “I Can’t Explain”
c) “Who are You?”
Questions for third contestant, Ed
8. If a man spends more time primping and posing in front of the mirror than his wife, he’s probably what?
a) quatrosexual
b) metrosexual
c) retrosexual
9. At a pricey restaurant, what would be the traditional last item to arrive, just before the wallet-busting bill?
a) Chateau Briand
b) Sauerbraten
c) Tiramisu
10. Which brand of gum is also a type of nuclear sub used by the U.S. Navy?
a) Hubba Bubba
b) CareFree
c) Trident
11. You’re taking a vacation like the one in the film Sideways. What are you doing?
a) skiing in Colorado
b) wine-tasting in California
c) surfing in Hawaii
1 vs. 100 Brings in some Boosters
1 vs. 100 Brings in some Boosters by Roxanne McDonald
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Adding perks to the evidently drooping “1 vs. 100,” the producers give us follow-ups of the delightful and the disgusting kinds. |
There’s not much recapping or reporting going on about the still nascent “1 vs. 100.” There are ratings charts, such as the one at Wiki, which reveal viewer numbers decreased sharply—from 12.2 million in October of 2006, spiraling then spiking in the next months, then ending at a low 9 million viewers by February of 2007. And so this writer infers that maybe the producers felt a need for some boosting of appeal?
During interstices, right before and/or after commercial breaks, we can see and hear past contestants who were big winners. One guy, for instance, sits with his Mama for an interview, telling us how she was going to kill him if he didn’t take the mob over the money. I think it was also for this individual that another promotional type (in
Vegas? In Atlantic City?) gives the man a chance to win big in the casinos, so he can get at least a little closer to helping his Mama pay off her house.
Also new to the show’s format is some type of chance to double one’s winnings…before taking off for home. When the contestant says she wants to take the money instead of the mob, Saget offers her the chance to double her money by answering just one more question. In the episode where this new element is first put into play, the contestant declines, but just for kicks answers to see what she would or would not have won. It was a fairly easy question, and she was right, so had she taken the double-up opportunity…sigh.
1 vs. 100 Host Plays a Good Game
1 vs. 100 Host Plays a Good Game by Roxanne McDonald
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Forget the running jokes about Bob Saget. He is a seasoned comic who plays it smart when it comes to keeping gigs. |
That’s a lot more than we can say for other TV personalities. While Saget typically is made the butt of cheesy jokes or crass allusions, the comic has earned his right to be high profile in a respectable way, despite the venue. And you might be surprised to know this white-bread persona, the one TV-viewing old ladies might want to take by the cheeks and tweak a little, the one other mothers might love to have for a son-in-law, has a dark side that matches that of any long-standing comic.
In fact, because of this dark side, he makes himself a willing target for the picking and panning.
I have always loved Saget. I appreciated the perfect fit he made as the worrisome Tanner patriarch. I guffawed on occasion at his wise-cracking as host of America’s Funniest Home Videos. And I could easily imagine having a fling with this fawnish good looking guy.
Then I discovered another Saget, one who had me sitting bolt upright in bed in paroxysms of laughter. I had the joy of happening upon a film called The Aristocrats (which I write about at greater length elsewhere here). As you may know and as any comic knows, the variants of the aristocrats joke are as numerous as comic styles: a family goes to this talent agent’s office… [see the aristocrats.com for the rest]. So director Paul Provenza films some 100 comedians and comediennes discussing The Aristocrats. In there is Bob Saget, foul-mouthed, crass, and in mock disgust at his actually participating in the crudest and funniest of in-jokes.
Jeopardy King Jennings a Pawn in the 1 vs. 100 Game?
Jeopardy King Jennings a Pawn in the 1 vs. 100 Game? by Roxanne McDonald
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Most successful Jeopardy contestant ever Ken Jennings has nothing but negative criticism and suggestions for improvements for the show he says duped him into playing one of the 100. |
As Don Kaplan of TV Guide.com reports, Ken Jennings—the “all-time biggest winner in the history of Jeopardy!” expressed his disdain for the new game show, “1 vs. 100”.
Jennings’ claims begin with his believing he was “cajoled” into participating as one of the “mob” on “1 vs. 100” by NBC officials. Next, Jennings assigns such adjectives to the new show as “non-compelling” (as in his reasons for “letting
[himself] be cajoled…” wha?), “agonizing” (as in the process he endured in the taping of the show), and, implied as it is, manipulative, dismissive, and deficient as a game show (as in unsupportive because NBC did not “pay for the trip from his home outside Seattle to Los Angeles,” because he did not “win enough money to pay for his travel,” and because he did not necessarily get the opportunities to meet “other game show elite winners” or the opportunity to promote his new book).
Hmm, seems further investigation is in order to learn whether Jennings performed well, first of all, and whether NBC or affiliates/associates ever directly or indirectly pushed Jennings in his favor to begin with.
After all, was he asked to be the one or one of the one hundred? And in the offer, was there a clause requesting Jennings’ advice on formatting?
Seems like the grapes appeared tempting enough for him to follow through with a visit to the vineyard to start, anyway. Too bad they turned sour for the vaulted one.
SirLinksAlot 1 vs. 100 Links
1 vs 100 and Mob Mentality a Winning Mix for a Change
1 vs 100 and Mob Mentality a Winning Mix for a Change by Roxanne McDonald
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They use the mob, they compete against the mob, and they appeal to the mob of viewers…rare in this day of dying game shows as we know them. |
I hate to harp on it, but “Deal or No Deal” is just dull—save for the ever charismatic but wasted comedy of Howie Mandel. And is “Who Wants to be a Millionaire” even on anymore? Okay. So that leaves a fairly entertaining “Identity” and this other neo-traditional game show, “1 vs. 100”.
“1 vs. 100” is hosted by the once adorable and now seemingly just worn-down Danny Tanner—I mean Bob Saget. It consists, too, of one contestant and a “mob” of 100 individuals—some personalities, occasionally a celebrity. (When I saw my first installment, Danny Bonaduce was the featured mobster, though he didn’t last long.)
A multiple choice question is posed and posted, prompting the contestant to answer by locking his or her answer. At the same time, the 100 “opponents” lock in their answers. Then the main contestant can choose to take a hike (or, wait, he may have to do this before he locks in), taking with him/her the monies won thus far. If he/she stays, the right answer is lighted up, and then Saget announces the number of pwople in the mob who got it wrong. (read more…)
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