No More Simple in Shanghai
No More Simple in Shanghai: ANTM 10 Recap by Roxanne McDonald
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Bianca, Chantal, Heather, Jenah, Lisa, and Saleisha head for Shanghai, China, where they struggle with the same challenges. What’s that saying? Everywhere I go, there I am? |
It’s futuristic, like in “The Jetsons,” Chantal suggests. It’s like no other city except maybe Las Vegas, says Heather. It’s the new temporary home (in a 63rd-floor penthouse in the Shima Hotel) of the remaining six “America’s Next Top Model” contestants and the venue
for the next installment of Girls Gone Mental. Heather’s left out of the bed choosing; and after a brief ganging-up on Heather, Bianca makes concessions for her disability and offers to share a bed so Heather can have one.
Tyra mail reflects the in-fighting, or alludes to it, explaining the girls will be doing some kind of kick-ass modeling. Louis Liu does a martial arts skit and then introduces himself as their instructor for the day: positions, which he identifies in Chinese, include the Snapping Kick, and several numbered poses…hint-hint.
Their test is two at a time suspended on wires in mid-air, ala Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Jenah and Chantal go first in a battle of the bouncing blondes. Next go Lisa and Saleisha, swinging into positions two and seven. And Bianca and Heather go up, despite Bianca’s repeating to us how she wants to go shopping and not hang off buildings…, because in truth, she is terrified of heights.
For all of Heather’s “disability”, she is the one who is savvy about the notion of doing the hard challenges to be a model and is the one supportive of Bianca for a change. Bianca can’t handle it, however, and once she insists she be brought down, she is disqualified. Heather is loving it up there, and as she gets a rush from doing the positions, gets kudos from the others and the first place prize to go shopping. She chooses Chantal knowing Bianca really wanted it, because she says this will be a little “tough love.”
The first photo shoot requires the six bring their individual personalities: uh-oh, another requisite is memorizing lines for Cover Girl advertising. We know that no matter how awesome Heather looks and comes off in print, her weakness is in delivery of any verbal text.
Saleisha looks way too made up, which makes her look old. She does well, save for a mispronunciation here and there. Bianca is peppy and all smiles (so adorable), and she is “so believable” says Jeffrey Chiu, the director of photography. Heather is stilted and stuttering, and Chiu, tries to get her to let it flow. Jay is so understanding, and walks her through by feeding her one line at a time. That still comes off rough.
Jenah does over thirteen takes, and Chantal, who looks hyper-animated, like a Howdy Doody doll, still pulls off the girl next door essence Jay likes. Lisa looks beautiful but as if she is trying to stifle some gas. Jay is also supper accommodating, reminding her they can start over as much as they have to. But she is still flogging herself after the shoot, and says that she is the only one who has to sweat the challenges and shoots. Maybe she didn’t see Heather struggle?
Underestimating Aspergers
Underestimating Asperger’s on ANTM by Roxanne McDonald
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Word to the unwise: Heather may just out-model you all. |
Like any season of “America’s Next Top Model,” this ninth cycle features an underdog–for the ratings or the credit for empowering the same or for whatever other reasons.
And like any abominable challenge—deterioration of
eyesight (retinitis pigmentosa), loss of short-term memory, even a Vargas Nerve disorder—Heather’s Asperger’s Syndrome is misinterpreted, misunderstood, and misjudged (underestimated) by the fellow ANTM contestants.
Chantal camera-talks that Heather is over her head in this competition, deciding that having “no social skills” will be her downfall.
Janet calls Heather “spacey”.
Bianca has decided, back at the loft when Heather leaves something out after she eats, that Heather is “on delay,” whatever that means; and during a fashion-shopping challenge, Jenah announces that Heather has no clue about what is happening and what she should be doing.
Sharp and Steadfast Wins the Race
Sharp and Steadfast Wins the Race by Roxanne McDonald
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There may have been as wide open a gaped mouth on our faces as was on Renee’s when she didn’t place in the final two or win. There may have been a greatly disappointed Natasha fan base. But there were likely also numerous cheers as Jaslene proved determination and consistency can win “America’s Next Top Model.” |
It was nerve-rattling when Renee complained and complained for the first few weeks, so much that many of us wanted her off. But she continued to take beautiful photographs and some of us came around to accepting she just might win.
It was weird when Natasha would smile at the most negative of critiques, and impressive how she would stand up to the attacks on her personality by the other girls. But still others of us thought she just might take the final prize.
It was interesting how the one we had the least to say about (in the negative) was steeling herself for the moment when she would snatch that win right out from under the
competing contradictions and caustic carping exchanges. [Note how the girls were against Renee, then against Natasha, then how Renee, when eliminated, went to Natasha and told her to “win it for the mothers”—after she had been bad-mouthing and wishing Natasha ill, for example.]
So here was this opinionated but keeping-to-herself contender. Here was this unique beauty, bringing the “fierceness” in almost every one of her shots. Here was a young woman from Chicago, working as an online admissions officer, trying out for “America’s Next Top Model” in September, 2006 (or for a show cycle which aired then), getting cut, and promising to return, and returning in a quiet but definitive manner, climbing the success ladder without stepping on the hands on the rungs below her.
Dionne’s Angry Stare Comes in Handy
Dionne’s Angry Stare Comes in Handy by Roxanne McDonald
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Oh, hell, no! We open and close episode 11 of this season’s “America’s Next Top Model” with the angry looks. |
Dionne discusses how she has been or has to work on her mistaken appearances as an angry model (having given the judges another series of poses last week that all looked the same—mad.
Natasha gets googly with her husband on the phone, leaning in close enough to get the others’ attention and elicit Renee’s saying she is weird and crazy—which Renee pantomimes for us with the circling of the side of the head motion…just in case we didn’t get the verbal interpretation.
Natasha discusses how the others are “always watching…always judging,” and says she “will get them.” Yikes. And we thought she was the kindest of the crowd.
Rainy day aboriginal dances are first on the agenda. In Royal National Park, Uncle Max greets the girls in aboriginal dress and face paint, then introduces them to his niece, Calita.
They explain the first task, and Renee then translates it for us by saying she thinks it is “all about telling a story,” she says: “They tell through dance; we tell through pictures.” Uh, yuh, sometimes. Mostly you just hawk stuff through pictures, dear.
Dionne scowls that she finally gets that it is more of “a acting type of dance” and Calita explains that they will indeed be doing a storyboard in person—painting, body movement, and oral speech the criteria for best.
Renee does a very thorough abuse and sisterhood combined theme; Jaslene does more agony and suffering but finding a way through life, love, and laughing; Natasha does her childhood and big dreams thing in a very hushed voice…to get their attention (or, I guess that of anyone not sitting straight up and eyes forward?); and Dionne…here we go…Dionne tells us she don’t want to do no dance” and hell no, tell a story? What story she rags. She does it anyway in a very quick and simple yeah, yeah, yeah performance.
Course, when Renee wins and chooses fellow pain survivor Jaslene, and after they get expensive pearl jewelry, Dionne backpedals a bit. Seventeen Magazine’s Carissa Rosenberg plugs the publication’s popularity as she discusses her intention in picking a winner: thirteen million readers, she says, want to know about you and your past. They want to connect on different levels. Renee, she says, wins, because she believes people would care and connect on those different levels.
Australia’s Next Top Model Host Erika Heynatz Guest on America’s Next Top Model
Australia’s Next Top Model Host Erika Heynatz Guest on America’s Next Top Model by Roxanne McDonald
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With the final six on a trip to Australia, we finally get to see both “Top Model” hosts in action. |
I had become entranced by the similar but different procedures and format of the sister show, “Australia’s Next Top Model”…then it went off the air (at my place, anyway). So I was delighted when the final six were flown to Australia and introduced to Erika Heynatz, who met them at the airport before Tyra actually introduces her to them.
Erika is, remember, harder, tougher, and more demanding in her delivery and judging style than Tyra, and to add to that, the competition challenges are all about being a
correspondent as well as a model, and add to that—whew—that the girls will have to adopt Aussie accents and use Aussie slang…and you have one mess of a week, as entertaining as it is.
At the airport, for starters, Erika introduces herself and then launches, in her Aussie tongue, into how the girls must be “absolutely nekked” after such a long flight and all, but how they “must be ready to get straight into the hard yakker…straight into chewing the fat with the locals.”
Yes, they will have to use slang as many times as they can to win the first challenge.
The Witch and the Wardrobe
The Witch and the Wardrobe–America’s Next Top Model Installment 7 by Roxanne McDonald
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After a my-pain-is-worse-than-yours session, the girls actually grow beyond their self-indulgent defense mechanisms. |
the seventh installment of Top Model 8 begins, we might think we are in for another hour of snips and snipes and gripes: Renee is depressed (which I think is typical fallout from an angry episode). Whitney is beating up on herself and discussing how she needs to improve, Dionne and Natasha miss their babies—though Dionne suggests that she misses her baby more as Natasha’s baby isn’t her biological baby?
While Renee apologizes and Jael says that just because she is an actress who can turn it on and off doesn’t mean her apology letter isn’t sincere.
Christian Marc comes to remove the rats’ nest of a weave from Brit’s sore head, and the Tyra mail sends the girls to a place where there can not be themselves. Tia Mowry is there to great, assist, and assess.
Natasha dons a witches hat and acts pretty mental but at
least changes up her voice; Jael wears a crown and poses as the queen of the world; and brit takes on a whacked out jester role. Renee does a forlorn pioneer girl in a bonnet; and Jaslene does a bleep-worthy bit in a burlesque showgirl headpiece. Dionne is at first lost in her sun hat, but with prompting from Tia does a southern belle; and Whitney with a western leopard-print hat does a seduction act, complete with hands touching her lips and her body—which Tia affirms as an excellent performance.
After a short time to rehearse a triple role (such as those of the themes of the last two episodes—kind of Three Faces of Eve acting), the girls perform for the fabulous Efren Ramirez (whom they whisper and gush over, having recognized him from Napoleon Dynamite). They each play their 1) melodramatic bitch; 2) diva type; and 3) perky bubbalicious model types; and Efren judges Renee the wildest and most impressive.
She gets to pick one friend (Dionne, who is shocked what with all the fighting the two have done) for the reward, and the two stand up in ceremony as Efron hands them each a tee-shirt, Dionne getting an “I voted for Dionne” shirt and Renee getting an “I voted for Renee tee-shirt.” That’s it. Not only are the prizes completely irrelevant and cheap, but the anticlimax bums them out even more than they were at the start of the day.
Smart Advice at the Smart Water Shindig
Smart Advice at the Smart Water Shindig by Roxanne McDonald
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Be elegant. Don’t monopolize. Have humor.How many succeeded with these three simple guidelines? |
One. Dionne ripped up the place with innocuous wit. At least, she impressed Benny Medina and company in a kind of bring out the youngster for a quick command performance for the elite with ennui moment.
All of the girls started with a very simple “challenge”…well, not even a challenge, really. They were invited to meet Leslie Hornby. Who? When their visitor arrived, it was Twiggy, bringing with her not only the lesson on how names make
the model but advice on how to act with a new model name.
Oh, and to reflect on past seasons of “America’s Next Top Model,” Melrose was brought back to discuss (how much discussing one could do at this level, I am not so sure) her name, Melissa Rose, which she changed to Melrose by getting rid of the “issa”.
Anyway, to test this unique name thing, the girls were taken to a posh party for Smart Water—where most did the socializing, schmoozing, and networking thing (smart Jaslene, for instance, realized they were there to “do business!”). Some were less wise, getting tipsy, getting in the faces of the celebrities, and getting, as Jael did, thrown in the pool (or, as Natasha did) throwing herself in the pool after Jaslene.
Okay, so it was their first big boy/big girl party.
Cross Models
Cross Models by Roxanne McDonald
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Cross-dressing, that is. And, some cross-talk, some cross thoughts, etc. |
How is it that the Top Model hopefuls who are at truly at the top of the game are the ones with the greatest pains and desires to flee?
Last week, Renee was all dramatic with her husband, telling him to come get her and take her away from this stupid competition and stupid house with the stupid girls surrounding her.
This week, Natasha is crying to her husband, Scott, how she is feeling persecuted or incompetent or whatnot (while the girls chat in the other room about how Natasha got married when she was only eighteen and her husband was forty—in, possibly, some mail-order bride scenario).
Both Renee and Natasha get high marks, lots of compliments, and make many fine choices. However, because of this, they get paranoid about the hostility in the house, I guess.
Mannequin twins await the girls at the first challenge. They come to life and introduce themselves as the famous twin models, Lawrence and Gregory Zarien, then give the girls the challenge of creating some fashionable looks for in-store displays…using themselves as mannequins and using the lessons they just got from Elite model Claudia Mason and Elite Model Management director, Cathy Gould.
Enough with the Ragging Renee
Enough with the Ragging Renee by Roxanne McDonald
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Misery loves company, but company does not necessarily love Renee. |
Sometimes, just sometimes, I wish the judges could make their decisions based upon the behind-the-scenes behavior.
But then, we might not be left with many contestants to watch. The old cliché holds true for this fourth (and the last three) episode(s)—that there is way too much whining going on. And Renee, the one with the least to cry about, is the leader of the mopey mob.
She carps about the clothing, the costume choices, the implied victimization.
She cries about the other girls.
She complains about the house, the street, the air, her hair….
Last night, after she was the only one to fail the posing in laser mazes challenge, she called her husband, Jason, and broke down sobbing, telling him to prepare to come and get her. Evidently, while there was only one winner (Whitney was “phenomenal,” said Benny Ninja, posing instructor, and he awarded her the 40k diamond bracelet from Angara), the others were kicking back in the loft and replaying their freakiest of moves and laughing. (read more…)
Imperfect Promenade
Imperfect Promenade and Plenty of Complaints by Roxanne McDonald
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Runway collisions and talking smack make for the perfectly imperfect high school themes of this week’s “America’s Next Top Model.” |
A marching band exercise starts off the night, then a group of planes fly overhead—in formation. [Was this done for the show? Wow. Expensive.] The planes cue Ms. Jay to prompt the girls to learn to walk the runway in formation, which is disastrous.
The crashing and carping continues as the girls do a prom theme runway show at a local high school. With
sub-themes of Modern/ Contempo; The 80s; and Ghetto Fab, the girls walk and stumble the runway, consistently collide (some of the groups’ girls clueless as to the sense of others walking with them) and have their own costume malfunction when Sarah’s dress flops open to aghast young audience members.
Later, Sarah will be reprimanded, but I’m wondering why the wardrobe either 1) didn’t glue the damned thing down or 2) try another dress altogether. Hey, I know, how about realizing that the “prom” dress was inappropriate for high schoolers? Whatever. I am sure we will be hearing more about this.
The only glue in the episode is the girls all complaining and criticizing—each other and the tasks and challenges.
Jael talks about Sarah’s costume. Renee bitches about Jaslene.
Top Model Winners—Where are They Now…or What Have They Done?
Top Model Winners—Where are They Now…or What Have They Done? by Roxanne McDonald
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After seeing Adrianne Curry on a documentary for sex toys, where she was demonstrating the fun of having a stripper pole in the bedroom, I started to wonder what other risky business the former Top Model winners have gotten into…. |
Seeing the posters in the Top Model Fashion History House (this season), I also was reminded of my favorites—like Yoanna and Naima and Eva—so I thought I would snoop into their new lives a bit:
Adrianne Curry, winner of season 1
Adrianne has modeled, done bit-part acting, and made several TV appearances. Well, that’s an understatement. Besides pulling in a million bucks for doing Playboy, Curry has garnered most of her post-Top Model fame by appearing in the reality TV show “My Fair Brady,” with husband Chris Knight (mostly fighting and being pissy), and by subsequently showing up for interviews with Kennedy on Reality TV Remix.
Also, evidently because of her bashing Banks in several interviews (did she learn nothing from the lessons?) in The Daily Collegian, Steppin’ Out, Page Six, and Playboy, Curry was removed as a reference in “America’s Next Top Model” seasons 3,4,5,6, and 7.
I will have to look closer to see if she is featured in the Fashion History House.
Yoanna House, winner of season 2
Beautiful and classy Yoanna did do a few gigs—for Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week, 2004; for a Declare Yourself voting campaign; for Psychology Today. She was contracted with Careline and 1st Opinion Model Management, in, respectively, Holland and Israel, and she was also awarded the accolade of being “the face of CW”. But now House is hosting “The Look for Less,” sitting in former Survivor Elizabeth Hasselbeck’s chair.
Eva Pigford, winner of season 3
The adorable Eva has landed several contracts, doing shoots/covers for DKNY, Samsung, King, Brides Noir, Women’s Health and Fitness, Elle Girl, Applebottoms, Star, and many others. She has done number of runway shos—such as Ellegirl/Wal-Mart, Gharani Strok, and an annual Models of Perfection gig.
And Pigford is no stranger to television post-Top Model, doing both reality (“Real World Hawaii”) and prime time dramas (like Kevin Hill), as well as hosting shows like BET’s “Rip the Runway.”
It helps, too, that her “My Life as a Cover Girl” pieces are fun and frolicky, rather than dishwater dull…as those of some of the other Top Model winners are.
Tears, Cheers and Random ANTM Jeers
Tears, Cheers and Random ANTM Jeers by Roxanne McDonald
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The premiere episode of “America’s Next Top Model” already has me giggling, grousing, and glued to the TV. |
Just caught three-quarters of the season premiere of “America’s Next Top Model” (as I had to catch American Idol, too—God, why do they back-to-back the best shows? What if we don’t have our TiVo set up yet?). Have a bunch of disconnected, non-recappy things to toss out there:
How much like Adriane’s is Joel’s voice? Or Sarah’s, for that matter? Will Mz. Mumbles get all the way, as Adrian did in season one? Will she find someone as puppy-dog in love with her as Peter Brady (er, Chris Knight) is with ANTM Adrian?
How beautiful was Tyra, with her sleek black dress and slick long hair?
How much do you think stylist Phillip Bloch looks like Clark Gable re-animated? Well, if you look quickly, he does.
How cool is the fashion history house? The giant posters make me think of how cool Naima and Eve were. Wonder what they’re doing now. Are they, like Adrian of season one, doing late-night sex toy documentaries? LOL.
How much do you love Kathleen’s hair? Wonder is she was the inspiration for the “Welcome to the Jungle” promos…though it’s a moot consideration now, as Kathleen was first to go.
Who thinks the complainer (and crier) of the bunch—Renee—is going to drop off, be dropped, or should be drop-kicked…asap?
Who thought Brittany’s Goodwill clothing choices weren’t that bad?
How proud are we that voluptuous models Whitney and Diana have made it through the first two cuts?
How sexy, cool, and beautiful is Jael?
Have you picked your winner yet?
SirLinksAlot America’s Next Top Model links
We Rooted for it to Happen, We KNEW it Would Happen: Yay, CariDee!
We Rooted for it to Happen, We KNEW it Would Happen: Yay, CariDee! by Roxanne McDonald
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The audience favorite for weeks in a row, CariDee rightfully takes the America’s Next Top Model win. |
We voted for her a number of weeks in a row (well, at least two) as the favorite model. She was the season seven model with the most first call-outs. And the blogs and forum boards reflect our love of the fresh and fun new model—who is regarded as “spunky” and “friendly” (yes, you can be the antithesis of the stereotype of a beeyatch-supermodel…), who is the best bet prediction by others, and because of whom many are carefully but jubilantly rejoicing that “it’s about time a blue-eyed blonde wins!”
While the headlines praise the twenty-one-year-old
photographer from Fargo, North Dakota for beating out the “pouty” Melrose, they are being too nice, too politically correct: rather, the headlines should read with much stronger language. Melrose was cruel—to less than self-assured young women like Anchal. Melrose was bullish—interrupting dinner conversations to talk about, of course, herself more. And Melrose was bossy and invasive, controlling and telling the others how to do everything from walking to cooking to dressing.
Finally, America’s Next Top Model Gives the Big Girls a Break
Finally, America’s Next Top Model Gives the Big Girls a Break by Roxanne McDonald
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I have been crying all along about the ridiculousness of the body size expectations for models, and my complaints have been answered: America’s Next Top Model will feature women other than coat hangers next season! |
Anchal was beautiful and fleshy and not, if you ask those of us who are, fat. But while her body was considered less than model acceptable and her lack of confidence suggested lack of effort and she was eliminated, Anchal may have a better chance returning next season on America’s Next Top Model.
For I understand from tmz.com, next season on ANTM the contestants will be allowed to meet a more realistic set of criteria:
not necessarily “plus-sized” models like Emme or Carrie Otis, the new season’s contestants will be what tmz’s writers and their sources say are “far from the stick figures we’re used to seeing on the runway.”
Reportedly, the Top Model contestants are not only more sizeable than coat hangers and hat racks but are more humble, more grateful, and, if you ask this avid America’s Next Top Model follower, more real and more watchable. Screw the catty and snooty and skinny ones who supposedly make the show so engaging…get rid of em all, except maybe Carrie Dee, who is utterly delightful as a model to view and a human to enjoy.
SirLinksAlot America’s Next Top Model Links
America’s Next Top Model—Only Coat Hangers Need Apply
America’s Next Top Model—Only Coat Hangers Need Apply by Roxanne McDonald
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As if one of the most beautiful, Anchal, doesn’t have low enough self-esteem, she has to worry (unnecessarily) about weight, too? |
It’s a well known given that fashion designers typically need/prefer coat hangers instead of humans for showing off their creations. You can read about it in sociological studies of the fashion and modeling world and you can occasionally hear a top designer admit it.
You can also tap into the numerous studies that emphasize a connection between cut-throat competitiveness and eating disorders, weight issues, and [distorted] body image disorders.
Tyra even has at least one session each season with the girls regarding eating habits, self-esteem, and how to reconcile the lot of issues associated with being a top model.
Ah, but there’s the contradiction. The industry mandates a body that can usually only be had by beating the hell out of healthy, curvaceous frames, but the most gorgeous of women—looking like real women with real tummy protuberances, full breasts, and thicker rumps and thighs—must undergo the lectures, criticisms, and continuous scrutiny that deems them unfit for the modeling world.
I love Tyra. She is of course gorgeous, and she has shape and heft that defies the Kate Mosses and Twiggys of yore. She is sharp, industrious, creative, friendly, and fun. I also love the show, America’s Next Top Model (for reasons I amplified last week), despite how the only round members on the show are the token contestants who last only a couple of weeks and a rational guest judge or two who gets that a weight the body wants to be is the weight to stay at.
But I get so blasted by the hypocrisy—the mixed messages that are about to deprogram and reprogram yet another lovely young woman.
Anchal is absolutely stunning. Breath-taking. In the October 25th episode of America’s Next Top Model, titled “Tyra’s Bringing Sexy or Sleazy Back,” Anchal gets the praise: In the photos taken by Tyra, wherein the girls wear psycho Halloween contact lenses and are done in kind of tintype/daguerreotype meets Max Factor shots, Anchal’s best shot elicits responses that speak to the absolutely perfect symmetry, etc.. And in the first award challenge, when Anchal steps into the room and up on the table at a private dinner hosted by Elite Model Management director Cathy Gould, guests are heard to comment on what a spectacularly stunning face she has.
But what Anchal hears is a guest saying she does not have a “model’s figure”.
Spotlighting the Creative Minds behind America’s Next Top Model
Spotlighting the Creative Minds behind America’s Next Top Model by Roxanne McDonald
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Their strike and certain criticism aside, the writers and their fantastic ideas for modeling challenges should be highlighted. |
It has been said that America’s Next Top Model ‘aint no Project Runway, but it isn’t trying to be. It has been sniffed that America’s Next Top Model is “trash”—when illustrious fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld implied it in his comment that “Trash that is funny for five minutes if you’re with other people. If you’re alone, it’s not funny.”
That America’s Next Top Model will never produce a Gemma Ward-caliber supermodel is the basis for criticism by Lagerfeld and others, including an Allure mag writer who bemoans how America’s Next Top Model “hasn’t exactly produced any supermodels.”
Well, the last we fans checked, we found the show is not purporting to be America’s Next Top Supermodel…and most of us don’t watch just for laughs. (We have Seinfeld and Boston Legal for that.)
At least, I know I watch for another reason—
the design of the competitions. So it’s time to highlight the creativity of the writers (nodding, of course, to those many make-up artists, wardrobe and prop peeps and others who execute the competitions in all their unique panache).
Consider the most recent (“The Girl Who Punk’d Ashton,” airing Wednesday, October 18th) challenge: the girls were each dressed and made up to look like a celebrity couple, each model first taking on the persona of one celeb, then the celeb’s mate. The best of each shot was then merged into one couple shot.
The challenge required acting while embodying the likes of Beyonce and JayZ (Eugena), JLo and Marc Anthony (AJ), Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston (Jaeda), Ellen Degeneres and Portia de Rossi (Michelle), Oprah and Stedman (Anchal), Angelina and Brad (Caridee), Demi and Ashton (Amanda), Britney and K-Fed (Brooke), and Melania and the Trump (Melrose). The outcome was striking (Caridee looked exactly like Angelina), fun (Amanda nailed the Ashton and Demi to the point where the judges found her double shot most convincing), and even, yes, Karl, funny (Ashal’s Stedman was bizarre what with the oversized old man wig, etc.).
The writers have done the doubling thing in other episodes as well, creating beautiful dualities, or even empowering the modeling contestants to be less introverted, have more confidence, or trump up their game-play with some new facial expressions. There was the hot car and hot versus a more puritanical (? well, more demure?) shoot where the girls were 1940’s pinups, for example, posing the models in two different outfits and attitudes and melding the photos as if the Janus (not Janice, ahem) entities were in communication.
America’s Next Top Model Fans Sick of Melrose Already
America’s Next Top Model Fans Sick of Melrose Already by Roxanne McDonald
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Melrose is letting reality TV stardom and ANTM opportunities go to her head…which is far too large for her body only four weeks in to the competition. |
I am so bloody fed up with know-it-alls and bitches on reality TV. When they get their come-uppance, when they get voted off the island or booted from a competition, so be it: they deserve the humility check. But when they harass and harangue in the meantime, I and many other devoted viewers get mad enough to want to boycott the show the crank is featured on.
The example today is Melrose, on America’s Next Top Model. She is waaay out of control with the self-aggrandizing, the hypocrisy, the plain old obnoxious yapping.
On the fourth episode, cheekily titled “The Girl Who Joined the Circus,” Melrose righteously celebrates the elimination of her arch rival, Monique, then takes off for rest while the others play “how many can fit in a shower.” Of course, being left out of the togetherness, Melrose comes out to command they keep it down for her.
Okay, so this is partially justified. They do have only a few hours to sleep before the next America’s Next Top Model task, and she does deserve the respect she has asked for. Except…she is so mean and bitchy that the others do not respect her.
Further, she deserves less: she verbally abuses the beautiful but insecure Anchal, starting by shaming her, saying how she (Melrose) is surprised by Anchal’s flexibility (at the contortionist photo shoot practice). What she implies is that Anchal is fat, a conversation-starter that in the model world is as good as the kiss of death.
Melrose bestows upon the innocent Anchal the lecture about having to do cardio exercises to burn fat, and adds that since she doesn’t see Anchal doing any such exercise it is understandable why she looks the way she does. Properly put out, Anchal does retort, saying how Melrose isn’t with her every minute of the day and doesn’t really know for sure what Anchal does and does not do.
America’s Next Top Model(s): We Adore You
America’s Next Top Model(s): We Adore You by Roxanne McDonald
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The next America’s Next Top Model (season 7!) is upon us. On September 20, the fantastic popular reality TV show that heralds host supermodel Tyra Banks, and features world-renowned photographer Nigel Barker, art and makeup designer and director Jay Manuel, and modeling mentor J. Alexander brings back the babes. |
A most engaging show, America’s Next Top Model, popularly known as ANTM, calls for auditions of thousands, narrows the competition to thirteen young women, and houses them together in posh housing, as it challenges them with photo shoots, runway walking, go-see tests, and advertising aptitude in places all over the world.
Each week, the modeling competition is a creative advertising effort, which challenges the girls who are then judged by the panel of Tyra, Nigel, one of the J.’s (usually Mz. Alexander), a guest professional in the modeling business, and a former model
(this and last seasons Twiggy sat and sits in, while Janice Dickinson did so the previous seasons).
Also each week, of course, the process of elimination is in the hands of the panel who assess poise, countenance, photogenic characteristics, and abilities to jump through whatever particular hoops are featured in that week – be it runway walking in platforms, self containment, or personal growth.
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