Julie Crack Crude and She Don’t Care
Julie Crack Crude and She Don’t Care by Roxanne McDonald
 |
A cornered amoeba cannot escape by flying.~from an old science text |
I’m still thinking about how nasty she was, how deluded she was, and how she made too miraculous a turnaround.
I have an ex who went coo-coo on me a couple of days ago, and his deluded ideas, perceptions, and interpretations of reality were so erroneous that I was reminded of Julie Chase:
~Last night at the party, Pepper set me up to look like a monster.
Unless you are a Wittgensteinian duckrabbit and Pepper is insisting you are just the duck or just the rabbit, dear (and I do not expect you to get the reference) Pepper could not “make” you look like anything other than what you portrayed yourself to be.
~I don’t give a rat’s ass about Pepper. She’s just screwed up her impression of me so badly.
So have the millions of viewers, too, then?
Then, suddenly, she starts doing a 360:
~I’m so afraid my family will will see normal people are nice…and I’m a monster.
Aha. You get it. But why now? So soon? Even crazy Christian Marguerite had to watch the episodes of herself on TV before she got her epiphany.
In an attempt to fly, the cornered ameoba, Mrs. Chase, writes to a Make Me Watch TV board with the disclaimer that we have to know that Trading Spouses is “very edited”. Oh, puh-lease.
It does not matter, JC, how edited it is (unless they actually morphed words into your mouth): you said what you said, repeatedly. And you had the most hateful look on your face almost every time.
My ex, when we were, unfortunately, together, would shoot dope and then come home (some twenty hours later), and with his short-sleeved arms held in protest, would cry out, “Babe, I swear to God I didn’t use.”
Uh-huh. You, Julie, and my sad sorry ex, should hear what a wise old southerner once said when she was being lied to: “Feed me s—t and call it peanut butter? I think not.”
SirLinksAlot Trading Spouses links
Trading Spouses: Wanna See Something Really Scary?
Trading Spouses: Wanna See Something Really Scary? by Roxanne McDonald
|
The biggest of bigots, Julie Chase gives viewers enough filthy prejudice to keep us puking for days to come. |
Bigotry is a putrid bedfellow. And in many areas of an evolving America, we have kicked it out, refused to entertain it, rejected it for the foul and hurtful thing that it is.
But then there is the beast, still prowling about our lives, still thriving and doing emotional drive-bys. On “Trading Spouses: You’re your New Mommy,” for instance,
meta-ignorant, hyper-anti-social freak Julie Chase, from Grant’s Pass, Oregon, gives reality TV viewers some fine insight into the kinds of people who really do still exist in all parts of the country.
Here are the bullets she has shot at “Trading Spouses”’ Pepper thus far:
–We live in a small community…great place to raise kids…or it was until the Mexicans moved in.
–Your birth defect is that you were born gay.
–[in a restaurant in a gay-friendly town, when Pepper asks if she need to use the restroom] I’m not goin’ in there!
–[To Pepper, in the same restaurant] Do you use the men or ladies’ [restroom]?
–Gaydar! He’s gay. He’s gay. He’s so gay he’s neon. No…he’s too attractive to be gay.
–They [Pepper’s family] have a maid and surprise, she’s Hispanic. That makes me uncomfortable because the Mexicans are gradually taking over.
–[To Pepper] It didn’t bother you that more and more people are coming here? I can’t deal with it.
–The problem is there’s a lot of them.
–We don’t see Juan Valdez doing anything good.
Trading Spouses, Turning Tables
Trading Spouses, Turning Tables by Roxanne McDonald
 |
The hyper-psycho-Christian calms down, but her new hubby more than makes up for the missing dramatics |
Marguerite was a holy roller from hell, really, her first time around on “Trading Spouses.” She was relentless about her faith—to the point of zealotry and alienating everyone she came in contact with. Her friends and neighbors, who visited the traded mommy, were equally unrelenting and cruel about their religion being superior, etc.
But when Marguerite made such an impact (was so horrendous she made the ratings soar, I imagine), FOX invited her back to switch partners once again. This time,
however, Marguerite was calm, almost docile, almost a lobotomy patient to her former self. She had watched the original airing and was embarrassed by her behavior and attitude. She decided to take the money (she originally declined, most vociferously, because it was relegated/parceled out by the other mom, who was a pagan and who therefore had tainted the money)—and get a stomach stapling or something.
Thinner, calmer, and reticent about round two, Marguerite meets Abasi—and gets knocked down to second place in the all-time most obnoxious reality TV personality category.
Abasi is moderately handsome, is probably the most intelligent and most articulate reality TV presence to date…and is hideously cruel and contradictory. He is on a black advocacy trip that allows for no interruption, disruption, or intrusion of whites. He is redundant. He is tendentious. He is relentless, making Marguerite’s former tirades look like sessions by a kindergarten teacher.
Abasi gets all passive aggressive, a little paranoid-delusional, and borderline abusive…until the sagacious Connie, one of Abasi’s friends yanks him by the collar (figuratively) and advises him to tone it down, be kinder, and keep his position but pay no mind to how others concede, resist, or retreat. Connie is brilliant in her presentation, which diffuses Abasi’s rage and shines a light into his tunnel vision.
Though it is a few days too late.
 |
|
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
