Let’s Review Why We Love New York

Let’s Review Why We Love (or Love to Hate) New York by Roxanne McDonald

In preparation for the April 15th, 2007 reunion of “I Love New York,” let’s review by way of classic New York quotes.

I still have to giggle a bit over some of the more creative cuts and putdowns that come of New York’s (Tiffany Pollard’s) mouth. And as there was a “Flavor of Love” marathon this weekend, I was reminded of not only where she got her illustrious start but just how wise-cracking she is.

New York on New York

New York is in the *&^$&# house. Live with it.

[After Flav conducts a blindfolded smell test of each of the girls] But, you know, broccoli is very powerful, rich in fiber and vitamins. So hey, I’m proud to smell like broccoli.

New York on Her Roommates

Pumkin just needs to get the facelift she so desperately needs….

Definitely [not right]…to serve raw poultry to his mother? She’s [Hottie’s] nuts.

I see Smiley taking away from Flav, emotionally draining him, being a pain in the ass.
So he [Flav] couldn’t figure out who she [Goldie] really was—inside this big huge joker.

Hoopz…there’s something about her: she nervouses me; she scares me, in a way.

I’m hopin Hoopz has the balls to step to me, cause I’m ready to just…take her out…you know.

I’ve never really cared for Hoopz, so it’s best we avoid each other, cause, you know….

[After Pumkin and Hoopz talk trash about New York’s drama and throwing herself at Flav] They’re both lesbians: I would say that Pumkin would be the lipstick lesbian and Hoopz, you know [gets that soft explanatory voice], would be the man.

[After New York gets one-on-one time with Flav] I’m sure it was eating them up. I’m glad it did. I don’t want them feeling good. I’m sure they’ll find something to do—twiddle their thumbs, knit, play with themselves….

New York to Fellow Competitors

[As she is preparing for her final night with Flav (in season two, the final episode, “Flav Belize in Love”) and is gathering her purse and smokes and whatnot to walk out the door, she zings to Delishis] I left my razor on the sink so you can shave your mustache….

New York on New York and Competitors

I have nothing against plus-sized women, but next to Goldie it’s so obvious—in the looks department, I’ve scored too high for her to catch up.

New York on ( or to) the Boyz of “I Love New York”

Remember when New York has her first chat with crybaby Romance and she listens to him cry and cry and then tells him she thinks he “must be good with trees”?

Remember when she poked fun at the wall-eyed one who thinks he has beautiful eyes?

Remember when she called one of the guys a pansy?

Remember how she would tell those earliest eliminated guys they just aren’t “good enough” for her?

Remember when she called T-Bone “greasy”?

Remember how often she said she loves the way Mr. Boston kisses?

And how WhiteBoy can’t kiss worth a damn?
And how she loved Real’s hair because it was so beautiful– like “wool”? More on Real:
I can look deep into Real’s puppy dog eyes and see a lot of love…and it scares me.

And how from minute one she loved that Chance has that evidently underrated “New York edge,” has a big mouth, “drinks a lot,” (which she “loooves”), is a “pushy, in-your-face loudmouth” (which turns her on).
More on Chance:
I’m impressed with Chance’s way with horses…. Just seeing him stroke those horses made we wanna stroke something else.
…Still am definitely feeling Chance.
[On Chance crying] Seeing Chance cry does not change [my opinion]…. Soldiers cry. Dogs cry. Doves cry. [uh-oh, you do realize what inspired Prince to write that song, right, New York?] And I cry. We all cry.
And on Tango:

First he is too emotional and in their first fight is a fake with his “pleather” and all.

Later, he is “gorgeous, big, strong, muscular….”
[Then again] Tango does not know how to Tango. How you gonna have that name when you have no rhythm?
[But finally…] Tango is definitely a lot more mature than Chance and Real. Turtles do live a lot longer than humans.”
And New York on New York…Again

[In the green room before the first season’s “Flavor of Love” reunion] New York is in the house, and you think I forgot about that sh-t? Hell, no…[holding up fingers accordingly] in five, four, three, two, muthaf—ing one!

Twill be interesting to hear what else she has to say—not only on the “I Love New York” reunion show, but then…then…on “Charm School,” where she might just lose some of that quintessential New York charm.

SirLinksAlot I Love New York links

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