Just What She Wants to Hear
Just What “The Bachelor”’s Hillary Wants to Hear by Roxanne McDonald
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Replay that episode of “The Bachelor”. Note how Hilary has selective hearing. Watch Hillary implode. |
Listen as Brad says “good friends” repeatedly, then tells us he doesn’t have the attraction he tried to have to Hillary. Hear Hillary tell us she is delighted with their attraction. Fast forward to Brad warning her again that are just “too good friends….” Watch Hillary get even more hopeful. Scream at
TV Hillary: pay attention! He is NOT saying anything good, here, and is trying to cut you loose as gently as he knows how!
This is not ambiguity. This is not convoluted courtship. It’s the very old, very cliché kiss of relationship death, Hill.
Years back, Oprah Winfrey issued a caveat: “If he SAYS he doesn’t want to commit, BELIEVE him.” Don’t try to change him or his mind. Forget growing on him, coming into favor. Let go of the possibility of his suddenly realizing what a gem in a dustbowl you are. Pay attention to what he is saying, not what you wish he were saying.
Poor girl. You could just see her mental mechanisms, her selectivity filters working overtime. You could just wince at her insistent ignorance of his gentle, noncommittal, borderline impersonal discussions with her.
Yeah, I would nine times out of ten get pissed at the bachelor who was forked-tongued talking his way into and out of the contending bachelorettes’ hearts, heads, and …. But this time—unless what we saw was the result of super stringent editing—Hilary just didn’t HEAR what he was saying, just chose to hear a couple of buzz words that she made a whole relationship interpretation on.
As my therapist would have said, also way back when, “He gives you crumbs and you make a loaf of bread.” Or as one self-help group slogan went, “You’re taking your bucket to an empty well.” Or…, oh, hell, Hill, just replay the episode and then get on, move on with your life.
NEXT!
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